Centre of Zero

RSS
sad-jace:

Thanks to kalimayablack for this out of the blue awesomeness.  I also blame her for increasing my gothy ness further. I’m going to put on my socks ^_^

That’s going to keep being a thing.

sad-jace:

Thanks to kalimayablack for this out of the blue awesomeness.

I also blame her for increasing my gothy ness further.
I’m going to put on my socks ^_^

That’s going to keep being a thing.

teratocybernetics reblogged your photo and added:

…that’s a really weird effect, are you wearing clouded contacts?

Nope, just blinked. It happens sometimes where because my eyes are whatever blue-grey-silver-bleh, if I move them or blink during a longer exposure, spoopy effects occur. The best was one from a few years ago where it looks like I have Riddick eyes.

thebirdisthewurd reblogged your photo and added:
Egads your hair is getting looooong

You can’t even see how much, it’s down to my butt. I haven’t cut it since before I left Straya.

Autumn cannibal princess hat occurring. Antlers will follow, and hatchet, and sandwiches.

Autumn cannibal princess hat occurring. Antlers will follow, and hatchet, and sandwiches.

http://wayward-mobs.tumblr.com/post/93096015638/roachpatrol-kalimayablack-announcing-tower

frittahz:

roachpatrol:

kalimayablack:

[cut for brevity] [original here] [newer and better version of same stuff here]

Ok so I read the post the idea for this came from earlier (after deciding that this will be the next game I buy) and I just thought of a possible idea for a sequel: princess gets caught on purpose to get taken to another tower (or maybe a dungeon or something instead this time just to be different) that she knows already has another princess in it, they break out together & maybe fall in love and decide to continue getting caught and helping other princesses break themselves out and build an army of princesses and lady warriors and dragons etc thats as far as my idea goes so far but yeah.

This is actually an idea that came up when I first started seriously thinking about sequels. I always had it in the back of my head that there probably would be sequels, but of course I had to focus on finishing Tower first. While Tower was in the final stages and then in beta (by which point the creative worldbuildy storytelly stuff dang well better be done so you can fix all the things), I started tossing ideas about for what exactly the sequels would be, and this liberate-and-recruit theme was one of the early concepts I came up with. It won’t be the primary plot of either of the next two games, but it will appear as a subplot or minigame. I think when an idea like this comes up independently and repeatedly (I’ve seen a few posts of this type around, and not just re: Tower), it shows that there is a place for it in the wider cultural narrative. I wouldn’t be surprised to see this idea take hold and a lot of different interpretations of it get made into games. Like, what if the reason Princess Peach was always in another castle was that the whole time you were playing Mario trying to save her, she had it handled and was one step ahead, infiltrating castles to rescue Bowser’s captives and building an army to defeat him once and for all? And whenever Mario shows up he just gets in the way and risks blowing her cover and her whole operation, and Princess Peach has to be like “oh wow yes you sure did save me kthx” to get him to plumb off? Because Princess Peach is a wicked ninja spy commando elite extractor? That would be an awesome game. Now I want to go and work at Nintendo and make that game.

I’ve been trying to keep the windows physicsed on an inward tilt so that if Khoshekh jumps onto the pane, it will tip inwards and she’ll fall inside, instead of the other way, out a second floor window. She’s tried it a couple of times, just to be clear, this wasn’t some out of the blue idea just in case. It backfired a couple hours after I took this photo.
Once it got dark and there were tasty moths to chase, this ended exactly as badly as it looks like it could. She dislodged the knitting needle and the window slammed shut and punted her outwards.
I almost climbed out after her, then pelted downstairs to look for her. My adorable housemates had the good sense to bring torches because it was gone midnight. I found her next door in the freemasons’ yard, freaked out but intact. She’s hurt her right hind leg, it’s not broken but it’s tender so I’m keeping an eye on it. It’s not causing her to limp, she hasn’t gone into hiding, she was chasing all the toys and climbing all the things within minutes of getting back inside, she’s just a bit protective of the knee.
She’s currently snoozing at my feet and reaches over every so often to pap my ankle, which makes me feel like the dumbest and worst and undeservingest incompetent dickhead excuse for a failure catparent with no foresight.
If there’s a moral to this story it’s that cats will flamboyantly undermine anything you do to try to keep them safe and then they’ll make you feel wretched about it. And that round windows are as wildly impractical as they are cool-looking.

Catapult, cataclysm, and catastrophe have already been covered by the home team while we were checking her for injuries and giving her all the treats ever, new submissions on the theme will not be read.

I’ve been trying to keep the windows physicsed on an inward tilt so that if Khoshekh jumps onto the pane, it will tip inwards and she’ll fall inside, instead of the other way, out a second floor window. She’s tried it a couple of times, just to be clear, this wasn’t some out of the blue idea just in case. It backfired a couple hours after I took this photo.
Once it got dark and there were tasty moths to chase, this ended exactly as badly as it looks like it could. She dislodged the knitting needle and the window slammed shut and punted her outwards.
I almost climbed out after her, then pelted downstairs to look for her. My adorable housemates had the good sense to bring torches because it was gone midnight. I found her next door in the freemasons’ yard, freaked out but intact. She’s hurt her right hind leg, it’s not broken but it’s tender so I’m keeping an eye on it. It’s not causing her to limp, she hasn’t gone into hiding, she was chasing all the toys and climbing all the things within minutes of getting back inside, she’s just a bit protective of the knee.
She’s currently snoozing at my feet and reaches over every so often to pap my ankle, which makes me feel like the dumbest and worst and undeservingest incompetent dickhead excuse for a failure catparent with no foresight.
If there’s a moral to this story it’s that cats will flamboyantly undermine anything you do to try to keep them safe and then they’ll make you feel wretched about it. And that round windows are as wildly impractical as they are cool-looking.

Catapult, cataclysm, and catastrophe have already been covered by the home team while we were checking her for injuries and giving her all the treats ever, new submissions on the theme will not be read.

Tower - the game of a princess tired of waiting

A short retro-styled fantasy story game. Available now for instant download.

image

Starring a Princess taking control of her own destiny, and a magical cat with strong eyeliner game.

image

Based on an original idea by Rachel Roach, made with love and lots of swearing by Kali Black (just to be clear, I did all the swearing — there’s no swearing in the game. It’s pretty kidsafe, depending on your stance on banana hammocks)

image

Things this game definitely includes:

  • flexibility for different play styles
  • Multiple endings
  • trope subversion
  • feminism dragon
  • a level shaped like a butt
  • chainmail banana hammock
  • underdressed dudes
  • references to Zork, The Princess Bride, The X Files, and more
  • meme
  • homage

Things this game definitely does not include:

  • metal bikinis
  • doomguys
  • damsels in distress

image

Regular price $4.99

For purchase, system requirements, installation instructions, reviews, and news, see http://kalimayablack.tumblr.com/tower

I’m also very happy to announce that thanks to the overwhelming positive response to Tower, I’m starting work on a sort of spiritual prequel with the working title Dragon, and have plans for a third installment, taking place after Tower and featuring characters from both games. I’m very excited ^_^

I’m considering offering a prize to the first person who finds the chainmail banana hammock unassisted. Other than, y’know, being the first person to find the chainmail banana hammock unassisted. Maybe an actual chainmail banana hammock. Like a little keyring sized chainmail banana hammock.

Ok I admit it. This post is all about how chainmail banana hammock is still REALLY funny to me.

[ETA] tumblr user (who has described themself as a very inexperienced gamer) was the first person to contact me and say they’d found the chainmail banana hammock, and I’m really proud for them because even the most hardcore gamer in my beta team, and the beta testers who are actually studying game design at college, couldn’t find the chainmail banana hammock unassisted.

Also, chainmail banana hammock is STILL really funny to me.

The thing is done! The download links are being emailed by a machine to all the people who preordered. There will be a proper post soon, or maybe tomorrow, I feel like I have rats eating the inside of my stomach so I should probably step away and have a cup of tea.

There’s going to be a short downtime on the checkout/delivery system while I update the product. It will be resolved within half an hour or so.

teratocybernetics:

kalimayablack:

NOT IF THE SPIDERSHARKS THOUGH

I WILL FIGURE OUT HOW TO PROPERLY COOK SPIDERSHARK OK YOU CAN DO THE THING

I’M DOING THE THING